The Past and the Future

So, a note to begin: I decided not to do uberman around the 24 hour mark. It wasn’t because I was tired or whatever… I simply realized that I have NOTHING to do with that extra time. I’ve been spending way too much time indoors sulking as it is (my girlfriend broke up with me 2 1/2 weeks ago. I’m starting to recover, but I still have my moments >_<), and it just wouldn’t be good for my mental state. I did learn a lot about the human brain and sleep though, so that’s good. I also had a lot of time for introspection, which gave me some surprising results. Anyways. The best thing that came out of it… will be covered in a future post. *suspense*

Also, I got into DOE (Discover Ocean Engineering) for my FPOP (Freshman Pre-Orientation Program)!! It was my first choice, followed by Discover Mechanical Engineering, Discover Electrical Engineering and Computer Science, Freshman Urban Program, and Discover Exercise and Wellness. But those don’t matter because I’mma build an underwater robot!

Anyways.

What I really want to talk about today is leaving and the separation anxiety that I am already feeling. As most of you probably know, I’m going to MIT in the fall. Now, what this means is that I have to leave my home and my family and friends to study at this place at which I know almost nobody. Now, I’m not too concerned about making friends; sure, I can be a little shy, but I also plan to be involved (marching band, gaMIT, and Outing Club, to name a few possibilities). So I’m not too worried about that. What I am worried about is leaving my friends and family and just, my HOME behind. I have worked so hard to be comfortable in my place, and now I have to leave? It’s just… unfair.

Now, back in the day, I disliked my hometown a lot. It was too this, too that, and I was bullied a lot. I couldn’t wait to get out. Now, faced with my impending departure, I’m taken the time to really look at the places in which I’ve lived. The park by my house, for example. I spend SO MUCH of my childhood there. There are so many memories and things that occurred there; I can’t even begin to describe them. My old school- a Catholic school that I attended for 3rd through 8th grade. I used to make hissing noises, form expelling crosses with my fingers, and flip that old building off every time I passed it. But now, I see the beauty in its old, old bricks and large, wooden-framed windows. Even the church next door holds a place in my heart. And camp… that is truly the most special place to me. That is the place, every summer from the one after 4th grade to the one after 10th, where I could really, truly be myself, without worry of whether I’d be ridiculed for my rather hyperactive demeanor or obsession with Clay Aiken. Just the camp itself, even… it has a smell unlike any other (I have a thing for smells). I could walk around that camp backwards in a blindfold and not get lost (well, maybe not on the trails…). If there is one thing I regret right now, it’s not applying to be a counselor there this summer. But that is another matter.

Anyways, all of these places from my life… yeah, I guess those are what I’ll miss most. I can always Skype with, write to, or call up my loved ones. But I can’t really go back to these familiar places… at least not for a couple months.

Note: Sorry this entry is a little scattered and self-indulgent. I just needed to get this out before bed.

UBERMAN DAY 1

2:25- I just “had” my first official nap on Uberman. The quotes are there because, really, I just kind of laid there for 25 minutes (My alarm is set at 25 minutes past each hour). I think that my lack of sleep can be attributed to three things: my excitement about this new experiment, the fact that my average bedtime has been ~3am for the past few weeks, and the fact that I was reading and working on the computer just prior to my nap. So… that is that. 3.5 hours until my next nap. Go team!

3:45- I’m starting to get drowsy. I’ve been surfing www.stevepavlina.com, reading about his polyphasic experience, as well as his 30-day raw cleanse and 92-day juice feast. I think… that we really have a lot in common. I’ve gathered, from what I’ve read, that he’s a real self-improver. He’s open to experimenting, and he’ll do things “just to see” if he can do it. He also really looks to the primordial human and compares it to the American human today. These attributes all really resound in me. See, this Uberman thing is really just an experiment for me. I want to test myself. Do I think it’s great in moderation? Sure. Everyman is actually really reasonable. Will I keep Uberman when I go away to school? Probably not. That doesn’t mean I shouldn’t experiment. I’m perfectly healthy- a vegan who eats as healthily as possible, who doesn’t take any drugs (except caffeine), and who is on the way to exercising regularly. In fact, I’m thinking of training for a 40-mile charity bike ride in early August. But anyways… This experiment should have no measurable impact on my health. And if it does… well, I’m pretty well in-tune with my body and its needs, so I’ll make that decision when I need to do so. Anyways… back to reading. Oh, and I hear a train, which only pass in my town at night and early morning. Cool!

4:40- Really tired. ;_; I’m listening to the album “Paper Television” by The Blow to help pass the time… it’s kind of peppy. Reading through Steve Palina’s polyphasic log, I saw that he allowed naps in-between regularly-scheduled naps. Unfortunately, I realized this just now, already too late to take a supplementary nap. I think I’ll get through it though. 1.25 hours? It can’t be too bad. During my adaptation phase, my main goal is to get through it. I have no major responsibilities within the next week or so, except two meetings tomorrow (one in-person and one online) and a Pride event this weekend… which will probably be a challenge. >_> But that’s what this is- a challenge. I’m doing this not for any end, for the means is a end in and of itself- as the greatest things in life are. To quote an unnamed talentless hack, “Ain’t about how fast I get there, ain’t about what’s waiting on the other side. It’s the climb.” And now, I turn back to teh Interwebs for entertainment.

5:40- Damn, I cannot wait to sleep. Twenty minutes… that’s it. This feels really surreal… like it should still be early in the night. Hell, in the school year, I got up at this time! Weird. However, I don’t feel too spacey yet. I might lay down maybe 5 minutes early, just to help me sleep. That sounds reasonable. Mrrrrrgh.

5:50- It’s starting to get light out. I can hear the birds chirping. This is kinda trippy. I’m going to lay down now, 10 minutes early, just because I really have nothing else to do.

10:30- Fffffff. I overslept. Yeah, I know what you’re thinking. But I’m not that terrible at this. I think I half-consciously disabled my alarm when it rang, so I slept until 10. Damn. But I will not give up! This is an important experiment. After discovering my error, I went back to sleep (it was time for my third nap). So anyways, this was a lesson, and I’m glad it happened this early. I know now to take extra naps when needed and that I need a better alarm system.

13:30- I just got back from my lunch meeting, which was quite nice. From now on, I plan to use the Stanford Sleepiness Scale to measure my tiredness:

I just ate, so I feel like I’m at about a 3. I hope I can increase my number a bit so I have an easier time sleeping. I really don’t want to skip another nap. >_> After my 2pm nap, I hope to play some guitar and maybe do some cleaning.

14:30-I just woke up from my 14:00 nap. One thing I really noticed is that I  got to sleep really quickly. I got about 15 minutes of non-deep sleep before I woke up, paranoid that I would sleep through my alarm. However, I didn’t, and I kinda sorta drifted off for the remaining time. I think I might have had some trouble getting to deeper sleep, too, because I had just eaten… I don’t usually sleep well if I eat before bed. Right now, my sleepiness is at about a 3.

16:30- I just woke up from a supplemental nap. I’m at about a 4… tired, but I don’t want to go to sleep. During my nap, though I did not dream, I feel myself falling into deeper and deeper sleep each consecutive nap. I want some REMMMMM…

18:30- I just woke up from my nap. I feel really warm, but not too tired. I had a small dream that upset me slightly… I will put it in my journal. I’ve been reading about raw foods, and I –really- like what I’m seeing. Being a vegan, I do read a bit about it, just in my normal reading. But now, I’m seeing how it is a reasonable and healthy way of eating. It makes a lot of sense. :) I have an AIM meeting tonight at 20:00 to discuss a job opportunity- a work-from-home job, which is awesome because no one wants to hire a green 18-year-old who’s leaving in two months. Holy shit- I’m leaving in two months! :D I feel like I’m around a 2 on the SSS.

21:00- I’m surprised by the amount of energy I feel. I think it may be an effect of that last bit of deep sleep. Right now, I’m at about a 2.

22:30- Just completed my “nap”- my last nap of day 1! It was way hot in my lout bed, and my brain was running pretty quickly, so I didn’t sleep at all. It passed quickly though. I’m at a 3 right now. Oh, and yaaay, I made it through one day! :D

Setting Forth in the Universe

Hey all! You know, I’m not going to apologize for or elaborate on my lack of blogs. Hence:

 

Today, I am officially starting the uberman sleep schedule. Uberman is a polyphasic sleep schedule in which one trains oneself to enter REM, the only really useful part of sleep, immediately after falling asleep. On this schedule, one takes six twenty-minute naps per day, thus fulfilling the healthy requirement of six daily cycles of REM. Yes, that's right... I'll –hopefully- end up needing only 2 hours of sleep per day.

I originally learned about polyphasic sleep at CPW, whilst getting my daily dose of vitamin C. I remarked to the guy standing next to me that I had gotten very little sleep during the weekend. I didn’t really think about it at all until a week or two ago, when I stumbled upon a discussion about it on the MIT 2014 Facebook group. So I looked it up, liked what I saw, and decided to try it. There are several different kinds of polyphasic sleep, all with different nap (and optional “core sleep”) arrangements. As mentioned above, I am trying uberman, which is often said to be the most “extreme” form of polyphasic sleep… but I feel up to the challenge!

I will document the experience on paper first, then probably transfer that information to teh Interwebz via this, DailyBooth, and maybe Facebook and YouTube too. I haven't really decided upon the specifics. Anyways, I will be taking my naps at 2, 6, and 10 AM and PM, +/- 30min.

The biggest struggle during the ~two-week adjustment period, after staying awake, is finding things to do. So, here's a list of possible activities (to which I will probably add), along with a key... It actually kind of doubles as a summer project goal list:

hang out with friends and be social*
practice sign language
search for music
make weaving loom
spin yarn
practice guitar*
practice bassoon*
practice piano*
knit (finish socks!)
chat & text
go biking**
go to the gym**
read Shakespeare
read Dawkins
read Thoreau (at a park?**)
fix the sewing machine
clean out bins downstairs**
clean my room
clean my folders (virtual and physical)
meditate

* = can only be done when no one is sleeping
** = can only be done during the daytime with suitable weather

So yeah... this will be an interesting experience. Wish me luck and light eyelids?